After a sizeable gap of around 5 years, here I'm back to blogging. Why, return is a pertinent query, add to this the fact that I've stayed away from this blog for 5 long years (admittedly, even forgetting about this blog for a while). I must confess upfront this desire for a return arose from a deep sense of perverse (if i may say so) nostalgia. Attending your college's annual festival, anyone would be forgiven for a little indulgence in nostalgia, but if you had anything of the kalalayam jeevitham (college life) that I was fortunate enough to have, Nostalgia is something you'll end up living with, and have a hard time coping up with.
While once again struggling with memories from a past life, I decided to indulge a bit more down memory lane, and looked up my orkut profile. For those of you who were born in facebook, orkut was the way we primitive beings used to do those social networking whatevers before facebook came along and taught us that having at least 160 likes for your profile picture is a necessary precondition for social acceptability. While going through my defunct profile in orkut, the photos, videos and profiles really did take me deep down memory lane, and eventually I stumbled upon my old blog. Reading my old posts gave my memory quite a jog, and more importantly it made me realize why I started blogging in the first place. To jot down vividly my experiences on a regular basis so as to give me a clear recollection of my thoughts, and share my opinions with whoever is kind enough to read my blog.
Looking back over these five years, between my last blog post and this one, it seems as though everything has changed beyond recognition and at a pace that is quite disconcerting. For starters its been close to two years since we've left the safety of college, and for two years we've been out in the big bad world trying hard not to let it break us down. Initially my first reaction on reading my previous posts was surprise at the thought process i used to possess then. It is only now I remember that I used to be a person with intense idealist beliefs and a believer of high ideologies. I marvel at my own weakness when i admit that its taken only two years for me to lose it all. Now I have become a wholesome cynic, with no real belief in anything except in power and money.
During these past 5 years if there is one principle reason i haven't blogged then it can be surmised in three letters, S C T. The four years spent at this college where a whirlwind of activities, with everyday being eventful. Everyday was indeed another day and i believe the term ordinary wasn't applicable to anything that happened during those four years. From care free fun loving days of freshman year to the responsibility of organization and events execution in senior year, we've seen it all, and hopefully we've done it decently as well.
Now with a much beloved phase behind, I'm now in the subsistence phase of life , where I along with my batch mates are in a constant battle to earn, to subsist, to earn .. and become a new generation of people stuck in this vicious cycle. Eventually I believe we will all strive to earn money, to buy things we don't really need to impress people we don't really like. ( A big thank you to the creators of fight club for the memorable quote). But as we trudge along in this mundane battle of existence, it is the memories of SCT that provide warmth in this long cruel winter of life. It is a light that can never be put out and one that will push us on. Indeed it is this very light that reignited the blogger in me.
Here's a resolution to blog regularly and more importantly to keep moving.
Cheers
Mohammed Akram Akbar
